Godzilla 2014 – The Less You See the Worse Movie Review

Rating 1/5 – Godzilla 2014 is bad and not in a slang meaning “good” way.  Godzilla 2014 is awful because we barely got to see Godzilla, or Bryan Cranston or Ken Watanabe.  You know, the things that were advertised and everyone on the planet came to see.   When we got to see the monster fights, they were cool as shit.   But for some weird reason, the movie kept cutting away to Arron Johnson and Elizabeth Olsen and making it a story about a soldier trying to get somewhere while fighting Godzilla.  That’s what we want to see in a big budget movie starring one of the most famous monsters on Earth, a boring story about boring humans.  Let’s face some real facts about a Godzilla movie.  When you put Godzilla on the screen in anything the last thing you want to see is a story about boring humans.  This is going to be a very short review because there’s not really much to say about Godzilla 2014.   This is a shame because the trailers made it look so bloody cool.

Godzilla 2014:  Blame it on the Director

So who gets the blame for this shit-show of a movie?  Gareth Edwards of course.  Gareth Edwards directed the extremely low-budgeted 2010 movie, Monsters, and used precisely the same style when dealing with the monsters in that movie.   With a bare-bones budget of $500,000, he made a movie a lot of people were talking about.  Monsters was a survival horror about an alien invasion that centered on two characters trying to escape an attack in Mexico.     I can understand Gareth Edwards not showing the monster in that movie considering how low his budget was.  But there’s a huge difference between having only 500K as opposed to being handed $160 million for a movie that was supposed to be better than the 1998 disaster movie put out by Sony.

Cool Scenes Quick-Cut

Every single time they had a really cool scene with Godzilla 2014 they quick-cut away from it.  Remember that scene where they are closing the shelter doors in the trailer?   That’s pretty much how the entire movie went and it was fucking annoying.   Godzilla stomps through the city, quick-cut away and come back to afterward.  Godzilla hunts the other monsters?  Quick-cut away.  There was on cool scene where Godzilla sends a fire breath down the throat of one of the monsters, but it wasn’t enough to save this piece of shit movie.  After all the hype around Gareth Edwards directing a big budget movie like Godzilla 2014, you’d think there would at least be some great action set-pieces.  Instead we got a story about Arron Taylor Johnson trying to get home.    Let’s not forget the addition of Bryan Cranston and Ken Watanabe, who were also featured in the trailers.   “Let’s them fight” was all Watanabe had to say, and Cranston was killed off in the first part of the movie because. .reasons?

The Verdict

Bottom line?  Godzilla 2014 sucked.   Don’t waste your money on the ticket price, the iMax cost or the bloody blu ray.   It barely worth watching on commercial cable late at night.   Wait a few years until someone cuts all the Godzilla scenes into one and posts it one YouTube.   It’s going to be a short video but much more worth your time than this bullshit movie.




I'm from Brooklyn New York and this is my opinion on everything.